I’ll Update My Blog Someday
As usual, my grand plans to keep up here fell through. I take full responsibility. I have a good excuse for part of the time I’ve been away, but not for all the time. Which brings me to the title of this post. Because I put off writing here until “someday.” And since there is no someday, we all see how that went.
This figurative “someday” has done an excellent job of beating me up these last few weeks. How could a non-physical concept take me down like that? When you uproot your life after living in one place for 17 years, you will unearth a lot of someday projects, intentions, and dreams.
And we haven’t even really moved.
Let’s take a trip down Delusion Lane
It started as a temporary contract in Indianapolis a little over a year ago. John got set up in a serviceable townhouse only a five-minute walk from his job. (A “serviceable” living space is made immensely better when you are that close to your work!) I went back and forth from Pittsburgh to Indianapolis–369 miles one way, door-to-door of dreadful Interstate. Some of it in a Civic with a husky and a cat, both of whom get carsick. Next time you think I’m not crazy, remember this.
We liked Indianapolis. The animals liked Indianapolis. We loved our walkable neighborhood. John loved his commute. I hated that 369 mile drive. I hated being away from my kids, but they are adults, and my nest was basically empty. And John and I hated being apart. I spent more time in Indy. We started looking at houses.
Then the contract John was on was pulled from Indy. He was offered the position in Baltimore. We barely considered it. The most serious positions on the table was another one in Indy and one in Pittsburgh.
We gave up the idea that Indy was temporary.
The Packrat Spectrum
Every extra year you spend in one place makes moving worse, unless you’re one of those rare, organized minimalists. I’m on the other end of that teeter-totter. Not behind the handle of the teeter-totter where the hoarders sit, mind you, but I can reach out and touch that handle.
Since we still have our house in Pittsburgh, we haven’t moved everything. We liked the idea of a clean slate, so we moved out of the serviceable place and into a nice one where we could start fresh. So the “someday” and other things are looming in the Pittsburgh house. While I have faced some of them–donating three giant loads of stuff and throwing away so much I thought the garbage pickup would refuse it and leave me a note referring me to the dump–I have more. I know… it’s shameful.
It’s SUNday, Not Someday
That’s what happens when you wait to do things someday. Stuff builds up. Whether it’s physical junk in your house or tasks on your ToDo list or tabs on your browser or dreams in your head, as long as you think you’ll do it someday, it doesn’t happen. Look at a calendar. There is no Someday on it.
Now I use “someday” as a label when I go through things. If find something I hoped to do someday and can’t make a real plan, I get rid of it. Living without all of our stuff has helped us see how little we need too. We aren’t overwhelmed here. And everything I let go makes me feel a bit freer, because the weight of it is gone. The emotional tangle of it all loosens with every thing I let go.
Do you have a lot of “someday” projects? What is your plan?